The Kite Runner Week 3 Madison Deiter

The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini brought up so many emotions and even left me in tears at some points. I haven't read a book like The Kite Runner in such a long time which is probably the reason why I finished it in 2 days! Hosseini did a wonderful job keeping the reader on their feet since many things were unpredictable. Everything was mapped out perfectly, as it jumped from the past to the future in a way that made the reader really connect to the characters like Amir and Hassan.
SparkNotes did a really nice job of giving an in-depth description of the characters and how the characters reacted in important situations throughout the book. For example, I noted that Amir was very insecure growing up as he competed with Hassan for Baba's affection. I enjoyed seeing Amir grow up through the novel and how Amir reflected back on his actions towards the end, which made me realize how his character evolved. SparkNotes describes Amir as "passive-aggressive" with his relationship with Hassan. SparkNotes also notes the change in Amir "from a selfish child to a selfless adult". I agree with the part of Amir being a selfish child, but there were many aspects where Amir still had that selfish immaturity in him when he went back to Pakistan. Amir always had a way of putting his feelings first, but how he grew was realizing that that wasn't always the best answer.
 “My body was broken—just how badly I wouldn’t find out until later—but I felt healed. Healed at last. I laughed.” (p. 289) This quote stood out to me and SparkNotes because this is when Amir finally felt like he got what he deserved. As a reader, this made my confidence in Amir grow because throughout the book, Amir's guilt showed me that he wasn't evil, his guilt showed that he was human and that humans do make mistakes. The reason why this quote is so vital to Amir's character is because Amir finally came to terms with his guilt and felt like things were even between him and Hassan. SparkNotes summarizes this quote more than analyzes it which was disappointing. SparkNotes implies that Amir carries around his guilt because he felt like he never got the punishment that he deserved which I fully agree with. However, I believe there is another part of Amir's guilt that SparkNotes didn't cover which is the fact that Amir's guilt is what ultimately made him a good person. 
All in all, I was pleased with the way SparkNotes broke down the charactres and highlighted the important parts of the book, but there were somethings that one would have to read in order to get the full effect of this amazing novel.

The Road Week 4-Madison Deiter

“The Killer” A Sonnet –Maddison Deiter

Inspired by: The Road by Cormac McCarthy

How can someone try to love a killer?

He only has sleeping to free his mind

Yet to go fourth is his one painkiller

His gun starved with two bullets makes him blind

Why must we have to fear one another?

Watching the hand that can pull the trigger

His mind is a grave left with no brother

It is wry one is scared by a finger

But can a killer become pure of grief?

And yes his mind grew flowers from his son

A killer’s dreams been taken by a theif

Just to be returned by leaving the gun

A man and his son walking together

Leaving behind the killer forever

I wrote this sonnet about how the boy and the man were seen as the good guys throughout the book, but yet the boy was having trouble accepting they were good especially after the man killed a roadagent because killing was for the bad guys. I wanted to show the strength of the boy’s conscious as I believe the boy changed the man by showing him what good actually is.

“Dreams” –Madison Deiter

Inspired by: The Road by Cormac McCarthy

The man dreams about the dead eyes, each dream gets worse and worse as the man’s sweat mixes with the grass morning dew.

Dreams, the only time the man sees the creature and what the world was when his eyes are closed.

Dreams, the only time the man can reassure himself that he is strong. He is wise. He is good. Why is it that when he dreams of evil, he is comforted?

Dreams, the only time the man knows his happy dreams are worrisome, and the dark dreams are calming.

Dreams, the only time his wife is alive but to only be killed by the man’s guilt and hurt.

Dreams, the only time he sees the boy happy and childish as if cold and starvation are only a thing of legends.

Dreams, the only time the man’s subconscious mind melds with reality leaving him stumped. His dreams are a metaphor that he will only understand when he closes his eyes for eternity.

I wrote this because I was reminded of the importance of dreams throughout the novel. I found it very interesting that nightmares were a thing to be praised but good dreams were a sign of weakness. It just shows how this world they lived in is so parallel to what the world actually is. The man’s dreams were also a foreshadow for his slow death which made it easier for me to follow along and to grasp.

“The Good and the Bad” –Madison Deiter

Inspired by: The Road by Cormac McCarthy

As the day dies, the boy’s thoughts began to thrive.

The boy is welcomed by questions, ones that God can only keep alive .

The boy’s mind is a road that becomes split into two- one is bright, the other bleak.

The boy can see the man take one step closer in the direction of darkness making him weak.

The bullet left his gun and entered the skull of another.

The boy sees the man halfway down the road of despair when he intentionally tries to kill a brother.

The boy is told the man is good. They are good. This is what the good do.

But is it? The boy cannot hold back his heart nagging him to question, leaving his mind blue. Shall the boy dare lead the man by his heart rather than his mind?

The boy’s heart becomes stronger as his conscious leads him down the road so kind.

He is his own person now, he decides what makes one good and what makes one bad.

The boy imagines the bullet that killed a man. He remembers the man that was left to die from who the boy thought was his dad.

Similar to the sonnet, I really like how McCarthy made the man and the boy somewhat of a foil to one another just because the man had different values than the boy when it came to deciding what makes one good and what makes one bad. I liked how as the story went on, the boy’s character really began to grow stronger and more independent to the point where the boy’s values overrode the man’s. It showed me what good actually was and how good can help survival more than bad can.

Week 1 Running With Scissors- Madison Deiter

One book that has had a lasting impact on me was Running With Scissors by Augusten Burroughs. I read this last year in AP Lang as one of the memoirs of choice. This memoir showed the struggles of LGBT teens and how easily they can be taken advantage of. However, there were other aspects to this memoir where I did connect to. Having a mentally ill mother is something that Burroughs and I have in common. Burrough's mother was always in and out of his life unexpectedly and he had to grow up really fast as did I. Currently I do not have a relationship with my mom and I haven't encountered anyone else in my particular situation. That's why Running With Scissors made me feel like my situation wasn't uncommon and it made me feel less alone. Burrough's struggles with sexuality brought out feelings of depression and loneliness and I have suffered from depression and I know exactly what loneliness feels like even if you are surrounded with people who love you. I really enjoyed reading this book and it made me realize how much I appreciate memoirs and how sharing your story can help so many others like it did to me.